My Verse for 2011

 At the beginning of this year (2011), I chose my "theme verse for the year". I do this every year, instead of resolutions that only last 2 weeks I choose a verse to meditate on and remember all throughout a year. This year, I had an idea that there would be a lot of changes happening, with graduating high school and moving on. So far, I've been right. I came across this beautiful verse with a promise in Isaiah and knew right away it was mine. It was one of those that surprised me and caught me off guard, and now 8 and a half months later I'm still learning what it means.

Isaiah 43:18-19 "Forget the past, do not dwell on former things. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland."

I'm relating this to a little analogy. I love to drive. I've been in the drivers seat ever since i got my permit, the very day I turned 14. But 2 years ago I was in a car accident. I was stopped at a red light on a busy road during rush hour. A car, 2 cars behind me, ran the red light behind us, hit the car behind me, who hit me, I hit the car in front of me and he hit the car in front of him. It was epic, and terrifying. I wasn't hurt, but ever since then I've been absolutely paranoid of any car driving behind me. I find myself watching that car through my rear view mirror far more than I look out the windshield!

This is exactly the way my life is as well. I spend far too much time looking back at all the nice things in the past, but when it comes to the future or even the present I couldn't care less. I long for the former, easier days and just kind of drift through life. This is silly. I can't control my past any more than I can control the car behind me. All I can do is look ahead at where my life is going, and be sure that I don't make the same mistake that was made 2 years ago.

This seemed very applicable to me 8 months ago, and it is even more so now. I feel like God is saying to me, "yeah I know I did some great things for ya for the past 4 years. But stop dwelling on that and look at what I'm doing now! If you don't start paying attention, you're gonna miss the best part!!"

I know I am very discouraged and sad about all that's changing. But I believe it's happening for a reason and the best is yet to come. There's a light at the end of this tunnel, and i will continue searching until I find it.